Ahh... at the inevitable cycle in my life. The time when the inside hurts for romance and an intimate relationship with someone. Being single for two years I’ve grown and changed in many ways that I wouldn’t have if I were in a relationship, but the the empty void is there nonetheless. I ask God when sometimes... but all I hear is silence. I wonder if I’ll ever be at peace with my inner man. I can’t wait until I am sitting with God reviewing my life and immediately I know why. Why my insides are the way they are. Until then I guess I’ll have to take it a day at a time.
I got my passport today! That excited me greatly. Only 6 more weeks and I am done with my job... that seems a little crazy right now... or I feel slightly crazy right now... or both. It is getting very real, and I am quickly realizing how out of my comfort zone this whole thing is. Just yesterday I was the happiest man moving back into my house and having a dog to cuddle with. 300 days later here I am with nothing but question marks in my future and an odd sense that all of this is something I should get used to.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Monday, February 8, 2010
Avatar
Yes. I just saw it. I usually swear not to see movies like this, not just for it’s sci-fi-ish nature, but especially because everyone says “you HAVE to see it.” Something rises up in me when the collective world tells me that something is simply TOO good to pass up. OH REALLY? I say... and then swear not to give in to the masses no matter how GOOD it is. It’s the reason I still have yet to see any Star Wars movie, any ‘Pirates’ movie, or any of the Harry Potters. Sadly, I caved on the Lord of the Rings movies a couple years ago. I’ve been told it’s just a stubborn pride thing, but I don’t think that it is.
The truth is, Avatar brought out a lot of spiritual emotion in me. The whole experience felt like a glimpse of a battle in the spiritual realm. It had magic and whimsy and suspense. It was beauty in so many forms of the word. It painted a picture of how beauty started as a mere fantasy of sorts and became so deep as to bring to life and transform a soul, thus completely changing its reality. The movie had the single element that every great movie possesses. It spoke the unspeakable words that only the heart can understand. I left the theatre wanting to live a better story with my life, and for a movie to accomplish that is no small achievement.
The truth is, Avatar brought out a lot of spiritual emotion in me. The whole experience felt like a glimpse of a battle in the spiritual realm. It had magic and whimsy and suspense. It was beauty in so many forms of the word. It painted a picture of how beauty started as a mere fantasy of sorts and became so deep as to bring to life and transform a soul, thus completely changing its reality. The movie had the single element that every great movie possesses. It spoke the unspeakable words that only the heart can understand. I left the theatre wanting to live a better story with my life, and for a movie to accomplish that is no small achievement.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Angels and Demons
Oooh... I know, it sounds by the title that I’m going to write something deeply spiritual, but in fact, it’s just the movie that’s on in the background. (I needed a title) I sit here in the living room with mom and dad and try to tune out the TV. Night after night... movie, TV, movie, TV. It makes me grateful for 6 months without the mind-numbing divice.
I just figured out how to post from Macjournal to my blog, so that makes me smile. I need to become friends with this process, seeing as how I’m going to try and do this daily while I’m on the road. Writing is going to have to be my companion with the many miles of lonliness on my trek, but I think that God will be by my side and speak to me what I need to hear.
I get my van back tomorrow! I’ve been without her for a week, and I must say I kinda miss driving her boxy ass. Hopefully the gas milage will have improved and the bill won’t be too high. I figured out how many miles I will be driving last night, and even at 20 mpg I will spending over a grand just on gas.
In exactly two months from tomorrow I will depart on one of the most impressionable journeys of my life. A journey of matter. To most it’s just a trip, but to me it’s a journey of the soul, which is the only kind of journey that really matters.
I just figured out how to post from Macjournal to my blog, so that makes me smile. I need to become friends with this process, seeing as how I’m going to try and do this daily while I’m on the road. Writing is going to have to be my companion with the many miles of lonliness on my trek, but I think that God will be by my side and speak to me what I need to hear.
I get my van back tomorrow! I’ve been without her for a week, and I must say I kinda miss driving her boxy ass. Hopefully the gas milage will have improved and the bill won’t be too high. I figured out how many miles I will be driving last night, and even at 20 mpg I will spending over a grand just on gas.
In exactly two months from tomorrow I will depart on one of the most impressionable journeys of my life. A journey of matter. To most it’s just a trip, but to me it’s a journey of the soul, which is the only kind of journey that really matters.
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